Made a decision thru the week. It’s been almost a year since I left the bad relationship, a year I’ve been on my own again. And the same problem arose that led to the bad relationship – how the hell do I meet people when I dont go out much??
Archery helped get me out & mingling – and they’re all lovely people but there’s no-one there I’d date.
So, I went onto a dating site.
I was on there only a couple of days, but starting to despair because the guys contacting me were not my cup of tea at all.. Then I had a message from Man Who Lives In France (MWLIF)…
Hello I’m (MWLIF) never mind the circus, you want to run off to France good food, and amazing wine hehe
Ok – he refered to my profile, where I wonder if it’s too late run off to join the circus. He mentioned France, which I love.. I looked at his profile and immediately thought that it just might be interesting – the photo was of him being silly with a comedy moustache. So very different to all the serious poseur types or the bodybuilders or (seriously) pigfarmers. (Yes, its true. For some reason my profile seems to appeal to lots of American guys – including a pigfarmer, who’s photo was of him holding a pig. I tried to filter these out – no joy. And it’s cruel, I know as I’ve had it done back to me, but I just dont answer the messages.)
Anyway, MWLIF appeared to be pretty cute behind the comedy moustache, and it was very nice to have actual words in a message and not just the usual “hi sexy” or “hello beautiful” – so I msgd him back, mentioning how I lived in France, how much I liked it etc.. the conversation and chemistry kicked off straight away. We skyped on day 2 and each day since.
Yesterday I booked tickets for the channel tunnel.
And yes, I know everything you’re going to say. I’ve said it myself. I’m still saying it to myself. Probably thinking it now.
But, despite (and possibly because of at least some of) the misgivings, I’m off to Normandy next weekend.
And it’s crazy and wonderful and romantic and brilliant and absolutely fucking nuts.. and makes me feel alive – like a proper normal person instead of the Shadow I have been..
But it’s seriously been years since I’ve felt happy like this. And dammit, I’m giving it a chance.
Wish me luck..